Big Fat Snail (inspired by Roald Dahl)

One day in a store right down the street,
(James had earned some money and was getting a treat)
He splurged on chocs, candy and the works
(Including M&Ms, Mars and Perk)
He strolled to a spot, sat down and hail,
His rump was impaled on a Big Fat Snail!
“By gum,” Jim said, “holy cow!”
“How did that get there, how?”
At first it looked like a poor little thing,
But on closer observation, it had the evilest grin.
Jim started sweating, he was utterly scared
Its eyes were bulging, its teeth were bared.
(Here comes the part where he was a real twit.
When I tell his friends, he'll be the class git!)
Jimmy threw it some of his sour candy pops
And soon realized that it like strawberry chocs.
(Duh, snails are allergic to sour candy pops;
They react much better to strawberry chocs)
The snail started bubbling and melted to the ground
The acid reached him and at his feet he found
That he had started to melt and bubble down
And both James and the snail oozed to the ground!